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I Meet Chris!

01/05/12

I know how this is gonna sound, just read to the end - you'll find it's not what you think, or at least doesn't turn out that way? -Given all the thoughts and queries that were barreling through my head upon waking my mind kept wandering and I didn't catch all the details of this one. As I feel there MUST have been more to the dream at the beginning, I'm afraid my mind just kept daydreaming that this entry may or may not be missing pieces of today's lesson. I was just so blown away by the end cause I felt like I was having a 'breaking of the fourth wall' moment. The end turned out very surreal, but A LOT better than I was expecting. So much that I was caught 'unprepared' for the moment and found myself stuttering and acting rather shy like I feel I would in person. If I hadn't of woken up, I would have mistaken this for reality. Now that I 'am awake', I wanna go back there! -Nice of my Guides to do this for me? (and that can be interpreted as BOTH sincere and sarcastic...)

Please note that some details are messed up, which should have clued me in right away that I was dreaming, but didn't. I swear it felt so real in the dream.

As far as I know, in the dream I was 'stalking' Chris. I apparently grew impatient and found my way down to LA, so by chance I might happen to cross paths with him (PURELY coincidental of course?) I didn't find out where he lived in the dream, as strongly as I feel about that in real life I'm glad my Guides ensured I drew that line at that? -But I did find out where he shopped in LA. Which doesn't make sense cause this shopping center looked a lot like the CherryLane Mall here in Penticton. There was even snow on the ground as it was the middle of winder and thus everyone coming and going had winter gear like long coats and boots on. Course not everyone NEEDS all that stuff as it was relatively warm for the season this particular week, and we're all used to the COLD anyways, some of us wear shorts in this kind of weather! But that's not to mention that this was supposed to be LA (I think?) a place where it never snows? -I guess since I've never been to LA, my subconscious had to substitute?...

I'm there cause - well anyone who's come with me THIS FAR should know how I feel about Chris, and how impatient I must be to get as close to him as possible. So it's really not like I'm trying to be all creepy stalker in this dream, I just wanna place myself in the 'vicinity' of where he goes about his day, so that we might 'by chance' meet? -Which I get sloppy with. At the beginning of this dream I get a lil' gutsy and decide to allow myself the opportunity to get caught. Otherwise I would be a LOT more cautious about not being seen. But SURPRISE! I get my wish. -He spots me! I can't recall if he's already in his car, pulling out of the space, or if he hasn't even gotten to his car yet. But when I'm not expecting it, our eyes meet...

...IMMEDIATELY, he recognizes me. Guess he must have saw the video I made on YouTube? Uh oh?...

I freak, and try to make myself scarce amongst the customers and make my getaway. I don't think I return till tomorrow...

The next sequence is hard to explain. It's like time starts moving backwards - then forwards again? -I'm watching tv with my brother. I'm watching on MuchMusic Brittney Spears go through the ages, through her transformations since I've been 'out of it' when it comes to the music scene. What seems like just yesterday to me is probably a legacy for these kids today, (possibly including Chris?) -She transforms backwards from accomplished media mogul musician, to train wreck trailer trash, to teenage slut, all the way back to sweet and wholesome schoolgirl. WOW, that was a trip, it me and my brothers' reactions.

Then we start watching wrestling. We're watching the WWE from the Attitude Era, forward watching 'Tough Enough', the veterans teaching the rookies, I'm not sure I can recall what I see. I know I see Stone Cold Steve Austin, Andrew Martin (a.k.a. Test)(back from the dead), and I'm sure there's guys like Triple H and John Cena in there towards the end. I'm not quite sure what the point of this sequence is, I feel like it's just meaningless rambling of my brain going over everything from when I went into hiding, to NOW? -And you might be able to see the 'point' for all of that being included in the dream if you read what happens next?...

I go back to the Mall. I have no idea if Chris is here yet or if I came alone? -I enter the mall. HOLY CRAP it's packed, I must have a lot of people(spirits) in my head?! -Everywhere I go I'm bumping into people trying to buy last minute gifts, kids running around playing with stuff, it's a mad house. How am I gonna find Chris in this? More importantly, do I even really want him to find me?

This looks like CherryLane but it's really peculiar, the building itself seems to be constructed of three or four hexagons, jointed together. Making it one big confusing LABYRINTH to navigate one's self through. Or maybe it's just Spirit's way of forcing me to face my fears based on what happens next, they could be CREATING the mall as I move around, making it IMPOSSIBLE for me to get to where I'm trying to go?

I'm in the parking lot. And by chance I spot Chris' car. I don't know WHAT came over me, for some reason I'm walking DIRECTLY up to the car now, like I'm about to go over there and say DIRECTLY to his face "DAMNIT CHRIS, I LOVE YOU!" -I can feel myself 'thinking' in the dream. Thinking about the previous sequence. It's really garbled, doesn't make a lot of sense, but for some reason, a whole BUNCH of stuff is on my mind. I'm thinking of the end of the world, flow of time, what IS 2012 anyway?, look how much time I've wasted, how much of my life? -I guess that's kinda why when I walk up to the car, I just seem to STOP THINKING - JUST 'DO'!!!

Panic! ...(I started thinking again?)...(I change my mind?)...

I QUICKLY run away from the car. But I was there long enough to see what I 'think' is the top of Chris' hair, he's sitting in the driver's seat, he got a GOOD LOOK of me in the rear view mirror, or at least I think? -It's almost like a Hitchcock scenario. The main character isn't 'sure' of anything? -It's peculiar, I THOUGHT I saw for a moment there, on the top of Chris' hair there were some grey hairs, or white? -Why on Earth would he be getting grey hair?...

I make my way into the mall. I wanna just 'observe' the car from a distance. I know how cowardly that sounds. You'd understand if you knew me in person? -But I wanna make sure I'm FAR AWAY from the car, so he can't make me out? Part of the building is blocking me, or maybe some cars, from getting over to the higher parking lot, far away. I run into some people coming out of the the mall and it's gets annoying, I try to press past them. They appear to be 'bitchy' spoiled rich fashionistas with posh British accents. They seem kind of rude, I try to be polite but thinking I might start to get on their nerves as they look the way they do (and I'm dressed 'the way I am'?) they might start to act bitchy towards me - so I head inside, figure I can hug the walls and find a shortcut to the parking lot I want. -For some reason in the dream the parking lots are 'named' each one has a title, I can't remember what was the name of the sector Chris was parked in?

I go through many different stores, I believe I'm in a book store at one point, possibly a toy store the next since I keep running into KIDS KIDS KIDS everywhere I go. And they're all rowdy and brought their friends. -I try to act friendly towards them as I wanna practice cause for some reason, a part of me lately, deep down, has the desire to be a 'parent' some day in the future. I normally find kids quite intimidating, I always have. But my biological clock has been ticking pretty freakin' loud in my ear these past few months. I don't wanna press my luck or scare him off, but it really all started when I first came across Chris - and THIS all started?...

The mall is so confusing, I don't seem to be getting ANY CLOSER to the high parking lot, and by high I just mean it's the most popular, best parking spaces, and furthest away from Chris, while still maintaining a GOOD VIEW of his car from where he's parked. I decide to see if I can take a shortcut and go into the restroom. What on Earth - there's a door on the other side, leads to another restroom, and another, and another. When I finally come out I see Fin from Law & Order SVU making a bust on someone.

Geez, I don't want any trouble with the cops. For some reason I must look suspicious to him and he starts coming up behind me as I turn back around going through all the restrooms. When you got Fin Tutuola on your tail you better get your ass moving! -It's not my lucky day, there seems to be more restrooms attached here than when I first came in? -And there's even a Ladies Room on one of these here? -Fin almost catches up to me when I FINALLY come out the other side, and he's not after me anymore.

Now where do I go? I know I come across a food court at some point. I think I end up waiting in line for something somewhere, I don't know if I talk to him or he talks to me but I start talking to a kid at some point. This boy asks me what I'm looking for and if he can help? -I ask him- ...actually now I'm not sure 'what' I ask him, something about the parking lots? I point in the parking lot I wanna get to but his answer he gives me is the name of the parking lot Chris is in? -He points in the direction. Thanks a lot, punk-ass lil' cracka! (I don't mean that, I'm just under stress at this point...)

I face the music! I exit the mall the same way I came in. Through the double doors. Chris' car is parked a ways away so he won't see me from here. But still I walk slow cause I need to re-think my game plan? I'm thinking I'm thinking, should I just go over there?...

I spontaneously look to my right. Chris is there coming out of the store, with bags in his hands. OH SHIT! -I 'immediately' duck to the left, try my best to get out of sight. As he's walking back and I'm trying to hug the clutter on the left and be invisible, Chris has a smile on his face. "Okay, you can come on out now, that's enough now..." Chris is talking to me, he knows I'm here. -Chris has on black jeans and a black coat, with black platform boots. (Yeah right, like I really wouldn't take notice what he's wearing, cummon...)

I come out "Hi Chris." "Hi" he makes a bemused lil' laugh as he's saying it. He's not mad. I explain about approaching his car, I wasn't sure he saw me? I mumble when I talk (this is what makes me think this is reality, I just can't get my words out, I'm TRYING to be funny and charming?) He explains "we did!" -"WE"? -His car has moved, he's parked just out front the mall now, up against the sidewalk. There's a middle aged gentleman in the car, he waves, then comes out of the car and walks over to greet me. OH MY GOD THAT'S CHRIS' DAD???! -I don't think of these things like family when I think of Chris. My thoughts are always of just the two of us, this is so nerve wracking. Here's where he tells me to "stay the hell away from my son you freak!"

He extends his hand. "Pleasure to meet you sir" He reciprocates the gesture with a firm handshake and a smile. He might seem even more bemused that Chris. What the hell is going on here. They explain how they saw me, they were WONDERING how long it was gonna take me to come over and say hi? They thought it was hilarious my shyness. I guess I thought I being cleverly out of sight each time, Chris explains no he could see me all the time. -I wasn't even sure he saw me the very first time, but he says he did. -I guess the Dad knows who I am too, from the video. Wow am I ready to wet myself right now?!...

There's a 'weird' thing going on with the Dad. I keep shifting my hand around to different positions and he's shaking my hand weirdly, cause he just won't let go. How long is this guy gonna keep hold of my hand. What's he doing?...

I feel a GREAT sense of relief and releasal of pent up fear, LEAVE my body from this moment. It's like the dream is telling me - don't be so pessimistic, you might be pleasantly surprised? I was told before that it would be like this us meeting by my medium friend Rose. I 'so' wanted this to be reality. It was like a dream coming true! Chris couldn't BE more friendly and warm-hearted. Almost like he was EXPECTING I'd do this, and wondering what took me so long. (I'm not saying I'm gonna go out and do this in reality (Chris has a bodyguard) I'm just saying I think I get the lesson my Guides were trying to bestow upon me.)

Aw, so that means the grey hair I saw must have been Chris' DAD looking in the rear view in Chris' car? --Wait a minute! (as this older dude finally lets go on my hand and leans against the car. And as Chris finishes putting away the bags and walks over, opens the car door) I take a good look at the older dude's hair, it doesn't have one grey hair in it? -I look to my left at Chris' hair. He's got scattered grey hairs in his -'luxurious mane'- of his?...

And then just like that. Dream's over! Before I even have time to talk to Chris or his Dad, start a conversation. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. I'm suddenly and spontaneously SHOT backwards out of the moment and THROWN back into my head/body!!! I can still feel that warm comforting place in my mind upon waking!... ...

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