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conversations with death

today, the mother of my best friend, died.
it was an interesting sequence of events that led me to even still be awake, to answer his call at 7:37 in the morning.
it was a looming overcast day, the clouds were heavy and the rain was thick. I rushed to his home, knowing in my mind exactly must have happened. a sense of urgency and complete presence had taken over me when I heard his voice.
I stepped into the house, which was full of people. His body was still for a moment through the crack in the door, and even in that blur of time. I could feel his broken heart emanating off of his being. Two of my dearest brothers, my anchors, collapsed into my arms. my back against the door with a slam, we held each other tight. my core was instantly on fire; our collective sobs heaving from the very fibre of our souls.
clenched so, so tight. from the moment we touched each other. we held on, the way lovers do when they reunite after what seems like forever. but more so like, the way a family holds on in a sinking ship.
my core was instantly on fire; our collective sobs heaved from the very fiber of our souls.
I felt so many layers of emotion all at once. from remorse, to utter helplessness... complete misery, and yet wanting to keep it together for the sake of my friend.

I honor him so much, and have such a deep, profound respect for him. the creator loves all creatures, but... he is truly one of a kind. a wisdom so real and so intelligent. I know no one else like him.

I pray for his family in this time, as it is all very surreal to me at this point. I am having a hard time confronting death, especially as it is not someone that I have yet met. she created him, and will always be within him. I will always feel her, and appreciate all that she has done to affect the world positively. she was a woman of immense psychic potency, I pray that she is even more beautiful and free, wherever her spirit may be now.

Bless/ed be

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