I went in to town to see Adam and spent the night on his couch.. The last time I was there I was just beginning to grieve rachel leaving..:
I was walking through a field with a group of people. The only person I actually knew was Lucas. He had a shotgun. We were hunting,we weren't supposed to be in the field, there were gigantic soybeans growing on the ground, i stepped through a wall of corn. we were all trying to avoid being seen by the local farmer boys. We were spotted, and they began to yell out to their parents. The group scattered, there was a girl on a dirt bike who headed back for home. Others split, I began to head towards the mountains with a group of younger men.if I knew of a pass that we could take that would bring us to a safe place far away from the authorities, who were currently in hot pursuit of us. There was a lot of contracted resistance and anxiety that I felt. We knew we were safe in the mountains, but we were still worried. We came to a point in the path where there was a rocky overhang, and a very narrow, steep, and treacherous path ahead. The group was having doubts. We were all very afraid, but we knew we couldn't turn back. I surveyed the path ahead, loose rubble and boulders hanging on shear cliffs were littered on the thin goat sized trail. I thought and thought about the safest way for us to continue.. Suddenly rubble gave way and a rock slide came thundering down in front of us. It opened up a path up the hill
That would circumnavigate the goat trail. But there was a danger of another rock slide.. A smaller boy in the group stepped up, he said he knew how to handle it, we would have to assume a quadrupedal position, and on our tips of our fingers and toes, we would gently crawl without upsetting the rubble. He lead and the other young men followed. I was last, and still felt resistant fear.. It was like I was a spider, very easy to manouver around, I enjoyed the sensation and got a little reckless, I turned to crawl down the steeply falling side of the mountain.. Had a moment of realizing I was scared, and was frozen. My weight slowly pulling me head first down a cliff. The boys pulled me up. We made our way to a safe house in the hills. We knew the police were still hunting for us.. There were the girls from the group setting up camp, the police weren't looking for them anymore. The police came to the hideout and began searching for us. I ran into a closet and his behind the hanging clothes. I heard the police man coming, and he asked the girl who showed him back there if she saw the clothes moving.. I closed my eyes, and visualized myself invisible and ceased to exist for the moment. When I awoke I was in an entirely different place. I was with rachel, but she was clearly Kelsey (my previoud ex) in her physical form. She was cold and distant, and though we were still with each other, we both knew we had a limited time left before the relationship was over. I pleaded with her to please just connect with me. She said she didn't love me anymore. I said I know. She said she did t love me anymore. I said we on ly have a little time before its gone. She said it was pointless to try, she didn't love me anymore. I begged her to look me in the eyes I k ew if our souls would see eachother she couldn't deny she loved me, she would not look at me and said she didn't love me anymore. I begged to look at me.I don't love you. Look at me. I don't love you.