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Not dreaming, then a thousand boxes

I really thought that this particular dream theme would have stopped by now. I've been dreaming of finding a home for years. Since young adulthood. I'm looking to buy, or rent. I find an empty house, and start looking around at what I need to improve upon to make it livable. I choose paint colors. I plan repairs. I work with real estate agents. Sometimes I return to houses that I've already dreamt upon. But the meaning is pretty clear to me. I don't feel like I'm home, yet.

I've spent a good amount of time not dreaming this particular dream. Then two weeks ago it started again. I returned to a housing complex I've explored before. Three houses. All different sizes, with one octagonal space with a tree growing inside it. I think I even wrote about it here on Dreamcatcher, that space.

I was trying to decide whether I could live there, when I learned that my old boss and his family would be moving into the main house across the way. That intrigued me, but I wasn't put out by it at all. I quite liked them. This time, that space was kind of damp, as if it had been raining for some months, and the wood was saturated, no time to dry. I was thinking about how to waterproof a space like that when I woke up, realizing that I was looking again for a home, and that although I find suitable places, I never do move in...

Last night I was trying to get away from something or someone. I ended up in a huge room where people were stacking their packing boxes. I was moving. My things were being stacked along with the things of hundreds of other people. I realized I would most likely never see my stuff again, or wouldn't for such a long time. I didn't really care. I just wanted to find my boyfriend and hug him, but he was nowhere to be found. I kind of wandered around until I found a quiet room. It was small, and there was a TV, with an old VHS machine. There were some movies lying around. There was a couch. I wanted my boyfriend again, so we could cuddle up on the couch, and watch one of the movies. He did come in, and I was relieved to see him. He mentioned that the lighting wasn't great. White fluorescents overhead. I agreed. When I went to pick out a movie I was shocked to see that they were all solo porno videos of overweight women masturbating. We laughed about it, but in my mind I was like…..what the hell?

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