after the middle of the night wake, i woke up this morning with a strong voice of
"you need to accept it"
i knew i could wait no longer, i had to do the first test,,, i just had to, i could not remain in this knowing but not knowing space, it was making me crazy... so, i held my pee as long as i could then i called mark. we did the test together while i was on skype....
at first i was gonna have him read the results, but then my eyes could not help but look down in the corner at the little image of what i was showing, i saw it, it was positive!
we are having a baby!! we both knew it was true before this moment but just could not figure it out, so our miracle child grows in my womb.
mark had asked me a couple days ago to stop the clary sage,,, he felt the majik, he felt the gift and knew if she were here than this is meant to be.... still i asked him several several times again if he were sure, he was so clear and so happy,,, and so,,, the life grows happily in my womb!
i love you mark, i love you marks child, i love you satya, i love our family!!!
let it grow!
Traditional symbols of love always express a duality in which the two
antagonistic elements are, nevertheless, reconciled. Thus, the Indian lingam, the Yang-Yin, or even the Cross, where the upright beam is the world-axis and Chinese
the cross-beam the world of phenomena. They are, in other words, symbols of a
conjunction, or the expression of the ultimate goal of true love: the elimination of
dualism and separation, uniting them in the mystic ‘centre’, the ‘unvarying mean’
of Far Eastern philosophy. The rose, the lotus flower, the heart, the irradiating
point—these are the most frequent symbols of this hidden centre; ‘hidden’ because it does not exist in space, although it is imagined as doing so, but denotes the
state achieved through the elimination of separation. The biological act of love
itself expresses this desire to die in the object of the desire, to dissolve in that
which is already dissolved. According to the Book of Baruch: ‘Erotic desire and
its satisfaction is the key to the origin of the world. Disappointment in love and
the revenge which follows in its wake are the root of all the evil and the selfishness
in this world. The whole of history is the work of love. Beings seek and find one
another; separate and hurt one another; and in the end, comes acute suffering
which leads to renunciation.’ Or to put it another way: Maya as opposed to
Lilith, illusion balanced by the serpent.
To dream of love or being in love, suggests intense feelings carried over from a waking relationship. It refers to your contentment with what you already have and where you are in life. On the other hand, the dream may be compensatory and implies that you may not be getting enough love in your life. We naturally long for the sense to belong and to be accepted.
To see a couple in love or expressing love to each other, indicates success ahead for you.
To dream that your friend is in love with you, may be one of wish fulfillment. Perhaps you have developed feelings for your friend and are wondering how he or she feels. Your preoccupation has found its way into your dreaming mind. On the other hand, the dream may suggests that you have accepted certain qualities of your friend and incorporated it into your own character.
To dream that you are making love in public or in different places, relates to some overt sexual issue or need. Your dream may be telling you that you need to express yourself more openly. Alternatively, it represents your perceptions about your own sexuality in the context of social norms. You may be questioning your feelings about sex, marriage, love, and gender roles.
To dream of loving any object, denotes satisfaction with your present environments.
To dream that the love of others fills you with happy forebodings, successful affairs will give you contentment and freedom from the anxious cares of life. If you find that your love fails, or is not reciprocated, you will become despondent over some conflicting question arising in your mind as to whether it is best to change your mode of living or to marry and trust fortune for the future advancement of your state.
For a husband or wife to dream that their companion is loving, foretells great happiness around the hearthstone, and bright children will contribute to the sunshine of the home.
To dream of the love of parents, foretells uprightness in character and a continual progress toward fortune and elevation.
The love of animals, indicates contentment with what you possess, though you may not think so. For a time, fortune will crown you.
Dreaming of love of being in love, suggests intense feelings carried over from a waking relationship. It implies happiness and contentment with what you have and where you are in life. On the other hand, you may not be getting enough love in your daily life. We naturally long for the sense to belong and to be accepted. Seeing a couple in love or expressing love to each other indicates much success ahead for you. Dreaming that you are making love in public or in different places, relates to some overt sexual issue or need. Your dream may be telling you that you need to express yourself more openly. Alternatively, it represents your perceptions about your own sexuality in the context of politic and social norms. You may be questioning your feelings about sex, marriage, love, and gender roles.
To dream about acceptance, indicates issues of self-esteem and measuring up to the expectations of others. There is a waking situation where you are seeking acceptance and wanting to be a part of.
To dream that you are taking a test, indicates that you are being put to the test or being scrutinized in some way. If you fail the test, then it suggests that you are feeling inadequate or insecure about some aspect of your waking life. If you ace the test, then it means that you are prepared and ready for the task at hand. There is also the notion that if you visualize success, than you will achieve success. Thus, this dream may be a "practice exercise" for you to visualize success in your real life. Alternatively, the dream may be a pun on "feeling testy" and irritated.
If you dream about taking a test or exam, you are measuring yourself up in some way.
The test itself can represent problems and obstacles that you face in waking life.
Dreaming that you are studying for or taking a test and worrying that you won’t pass can mean that you are afraid of failure. If you dream that you show up late for a test, can’t find the exam room, come unprepared, hand in a blank paper or fail the test, you could be worried about being able to handle the challenges you are facing in life. Such dreams may also indicate anxiety about sexual performance.
On a positive note, if you dream of passing a test, your unconscious could be assuring you that you have every right to feel confident about your abilities.
A symbol of the future, as opposed to the old man who signifies the
past (49); but the child is also symbolic of that stage of life when the old man,
transformed, acquires a new simplicity—as Nietzsche implied in Thus Spake
Zarathustra when dealing with the ‘three transformations’. Hence the conception of the child as symbolic of the ‘mystic Centre’ and as the ‘youthful, reawakening force’ (56). In Christian iconography, children often appear as angels;
on the aesthetic plane they are found as putti in Baroque grotesque and ornamentations; and in traditional symbology they are dwarfs or Cabiri. In every case,
Jung argues, they symbolize formative forces of the unconscious of a beneficent and protective kind (32). Psychologically speaking, the child is of the soul—the
product of the coniunctio between the unconscious and consciousness: one dreams
of a child when some great spiritual change is about to take place under favourable
circumstances (33). The mystic child who solves riddles and teaches wisdom is
an archetypal figure having the same significance, but on the mythic plane of the
general and collective, and is an aspect of the heroic child who liberates the world
from monsters (60). In alchemy, the child wearing a crown or regal garments is a
symbol of the philosopher’s stone, that is, of the supreme realization of mystic
identification with the ‘god within us’ and with the eternal.
To dream that you are a small child again, suggests that you are feeling the burdens of adulthood. You are trying to escape from your daily responsibility and are looking for someone else to shield, protect and care for you.
To dream that you lose a child, represents losing hope. It may also suggests that a project is not working out as you had wanted it to.
To save a child in your dream, signifies your attempts to save a part of yourself from being destroyed. If you dream that you are separated from your children, then it symbolizes failure in some personal endeavor or a setback in some ideal you had.
Some people have reoccurring dreams about a small child, while others, from time to time, dream about unfamiliar children. The child in your dream could represent your inner self, or the child within. The dream could be based on childhood memories, and it may carry a specific message or bring up long-buried issues. On the other hand, the dream could simply be a pleasant memory. Children in dreams could symbolize a need and an eagerness to learn, simplicity, intuition, new endeavours and many other positive attributes of childhood. Occasionally, the child in your dreams may be pointing to your own childish ways. Therefore, consider all of the details and the tone of the dream before making an interpretation.
To dream that you are still in the womb, suggests that you are regressing into a period of time when you were safe and completely dependent. You may be trying to escape from the demands of your daily life.
To see the womb in your dream, represents creation, childbirth, fertility and new beginnings The dream is also symbolic of fresh new ideas.
To see a baby in your dream, signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings. Babies symbolize something in your own inner nature that is pure, vulnerable, helpless and/or uncorrupted. If you find a baby in your dream, then it suggests that you have acknowledged your hidden potential. If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, then it suggests that you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities; You do not want to let others know of your weaknesses. Alternatively, forgetting about a baby, represents an aspect of yourself that you have abandoned or put aside due to life's changing circumstances. The dream may serve as a reminder that it is time for you to pick up that old interest, hobby, or project again.
If you dream that you are on your way to the hospital to have a baby, then it signifies your issues of dependency and your desires to be completely care for. Perhaps you are trying to get out of some responsibility. If you are pregnant in real life, then a more direct interpretation may simply mean that you are experiencing some anxieties of making it to the hospital when the time comes.
To dream of a crying baby, symbolizes a part of yourself that is deprived of attention and needs to be nurtured. Alternatively, it represents your unfulfilled goals and a sense of lacking in your life. If you dream that a baby is neglected, then it suggests that you are not paying enough attention to yourself. You are not utilizing your full potential. Alternatively, this dream could represent your fears about your own children and your ability to protect and to provide for them.
To dream about a starving baby, represents your dependence on others. You are experiencing some deficiency in your life that needs immediate attention and gratification.
To dream of an extremely small baby, symbolizes your helplessness and your fears of letting others become aware of your vulnerabilities and incompetence. You may be afraid to ask for help and as a result tend to take matters into your own hands. http://www.dreammoods.com
To see a dead baby in your dream, symbolizes the ending of something that was once a part of you.
To dream that you are dipping a baby in and out of water, signifies regression. You are regressing to a time where you had no worries and responsibilities. Alternatively, such a scenario is reminisce of when the baby is in the fetus and in its comfort zone. In fact, some expectant mothers even give birth in a pool, because the environment in the water mimics the environment in the uterus. It is less traumatic for the baby as it emerges into the world. So perhaps, the dream represents your search for your own comfort zone.
To dream of crying babies, is indicative of ill health and disappointments.
A bright, clean baby, denotes love requited, and many warm friends. Walking alone, it is a sure sign of independence and a total ignoring of smaller spirits. If a woman dream she is nursing a baby, she will be deceived by the one she trusts most.
It is a bad sign to dream that you take your baby if sick with fever.
You will have many sorrows of mind.
If you are nursing a baby, it denotes sorrow and misfortune. If you see a baby that is
sick, it means that somebody among your relatives will die.
Dreaming of a baby in your dream means innocence, warmth and new beginnings. Babies may symbolize something in your own inner nature which is pure, vulnerable, and/or uncorrupted. If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, then it suggests that you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities; You do not want to let others know of your weaknesses. If you dream that you are on your way to the hospital to have a baby, then it means your issues of dependency and your desire to be completely care for. Perhaps you are trying to get out of some responsibility. If you are pregnant, then a more direct interpretation may simply mean that you are experiencing some anxieties of making it to the hospital when the time comes. Dreaming of a crying baby, is indicative of a part of yourself that is deprived of attention and needs some nurturing. Alternatively, it represents your unfulfilled goals and a sense of lacking in your life. Dreaming about a starving baby, represents your dependence on others. You are experiencing some deficiency in your life that needs immediate attention and gratification. Dreaming of an extremely small baby, symbolizes your helplessness and your fears of letting others become aware of your vulnerabilities and incompetence. You may be afraid to ask for help and as a result tend to take matters into your own hands. Dreaming of a dead baby in your dream, symbolizes the ending of something that is part of you. Dreaming that you are dipping a baby in and out of water means regression. You are regressing to a time where you had no worries and responsibilities. Alternatively, it is reminisce of when the baby is in the fetus and in its comfort zone. In fact, some expectant mothers even give birth in a pool, because the environment in the water mimics the environment in the uterus. It is less traumatic for the baby as it emerges into the world. So perhaps, the dream your search for your own comfort zone.
Many people from time to time will have babies or small children in their dreams. If these newborns are strangers to you, you can assume that they represent you. You are the baby and the dream is telling you something about your development in a particular area of your life. At times of great change and renewal, a baby may appear in a dream and represent your potential and a new beginning. Some of the meaning of the dream may be obtained by considering what the baby looked like and was doing. Generally, babies represent innocence and are symbols of the purest form of a human whose possibilities are endless. However, if the baby’s appearance is odd, and if your interactions with it are bizarre or unusual, you need to consider your own well being (psychologically) and think about what personal experiences and psychological hang-ups have prevented you from growing.
To dream that you are giving a gift, signifies your generosity towards others. Alternatively, you may be trying to express some feeling or have something awkward to say that has to be carefully packaged. If you are showering someone with gifts, then it indicates that you are being overly pushy with your advice. Or that you are trying to hard to be accepted. If you are buying or giving someone expensive gifts, then it symbolizes the sacrifices you are making for that person. You want to make them feel important.
To dream that you receive a gift, indicates that you are being rewarded and recognized for your generosity and giving nature. You are held in high esteem by those around you. If someone gives you an inappropriate gift, then it suggests that you are the subject of unwelcome attention from someone. If you dream that you give someone an inappropriate gift, then it suggests that your true nature will eventually be exposed. Analyze the gift you give or receive for additional significance.
To see a pile of gifts, symbolizes unutilized or unrecognized skills and talents.
To open a gift and find something disgusting inside, symbolizes disappointments or unexpected failures.
To dream that you receive gifts from any one, denotes that you will not be behind in your payments, and be unusually fortunate in speculations or love matters.
To send a gift, signifies displeasure will be shown you, and ill luck will surround your efforts.
For a young woman to dream that her lover sends her rich and beautiful gifts, denotes that she will make a wealthy and congenial marriage.
Dreaming that you are giving a gift means your generosity towards others. Alternatively, you may be trying to express some feeling or have something awkward to say that has to be carefully packaged. Dreaming that you receive a gift indicates your tremendous luck in fortune and love. You are being rewarded for a job well done and are held in high esteem by those around you.
To see sage in your dream, signifies wisdom, frugality and practicality.
To dream of sage, foretells thrift and economy will be practised by your servants or family. For a woman to think she has too much in her viands, omens she will regret useless extravagance in love as well as fortune.
Seeing sage in your dream means frugality and practicality. Dreaming that you use sage in food means that your extravagant lifestyle will leave you penniless in the end.