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Is my dead best-friend being reincarnated?

I have to write this down. It has been on my mind on and off and ever since I found out I was pregnant I've openly welcomed my dead best-friend to take on new life within me.

Meredith was a beautiful soul, the best there is. Loving and kind, deserving of life in every venue.

Before she died I had encouraged her to take up writing her dreams on here and the second to last before she posted had this in it:

Later, my friend Liz and I were inside my parent's house and I was feeling really attracted to her, I tried to kiss her but she just giggled and shrugged it off. We walked outside and threw off our clothes, headed for this outdoor swimming pool which was topped in snow and she dove in as I stood there with my feet in the snow wondering how cold the water would be. But she surfaced and said that it was warm, told me to dove in. So I jumped, felt suspended in the air for maybe a split second longer than usual as I watched my arms stretch out in front of me, not a perfect dive, but it took me to the bottom of the pool and the water was indeed warm. I came back up and then dove under again, and Liz dove under with me, and I caught a very vivid glimpse of her swimming and spinning around like a mermaid in the water, only this girl who in real life has long beautiful blonde hair had no hair, instead peachfuzz like a baby. We spiraled around each other, gaining momentum, and I felt that we could be spinning in outer space. Her skin was so white, so beautiful, glowing under the layer of snow that capped the top of the pool. It was like she was dancing, she held her arms to her body and moved in such a way that I was mesmerized. Our bodies mingled, she told me she was going to touch herself and I grabbed her other hand. She squeezed it, I heard her moaning with pleasure under the water, and when she came a stream of white liquid shot out of the water. It came back down into the water and floated there, suspended before my eyes.

They open.

I can't help but think that this dream was a sign to both of us. That she would be reincarnated with me being her mother. That she wasn't watching me any longer in the water but the becoming of herself. Of herself in my image. I love her dearly and perhaps since I was never ready for her death I'm searching for some kind of full circle. But not even a year since her passing and I am pregnant with my first child- a girl.

Estelle Neona will be born around April 21st, and a part of me feels like this is Meredith coming back to me. It may seem crazy but it feels true.

Regardless I love Meredith and Estelle separate of one another. Regardless of their true identities.

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