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You can't love enough to keep someone from death...

In my dream, I was away from home. In Portland, I think. Not sure why. Seems like it was a holiday. Had the clues to many holidays. Thanksgiving? I entered a house - the house of friends. Susy and Andrew? I was holding a kitten, may have been Iris. Barcode was there. In the dream, Iris was Barcode's daughter. I set Iris down to say hello and as they played the way kitties do, I noticed something terribly wrong. Barcode was injured. The flesh on her tail was laid open and she had blood on her in several places. I picked her up and she didn't seem in any pain at all. Cats have a way of being okay in any moment or situation. I realized she was going to have to go to the vet but I didn't know any vets in Portland. I went into the kitchen saying, "Call the emergency room!" and someone was already on the phone doing it. But he said that I'd have to do and wait for an appointment to not show up because they were all booked. I said, "Okay, that's fine, I'll do anything for my baby." I remember thinking, "Well, here goes my vacation money."
Barcode was uncomfortable and squirming, but I kept hold of her. Every now and then, she'd calm down and relax into loving me. We tried to hypothesize what had happened to her, but it was such a strange injury, it was hard to know. She had wounds on her neck (bites?) that were still bleeding. I realized I had a memory of dropping off a dog at a vet office nearby, with grandma and grandpa. They were close and mom was there with them. I quickly went to find my phone to call them. Barcode's head slipped into my collar - something she always did as a kitten when she was afraid. At first I thought it was cute, then I realized something was wrong. I reached in to pet her, to comfort her and she was cold and lifeless. I screamed, "No!" but I knew she was gone. I cried so hard in the dream, I was sobbing and wailing. Suddenly Molly was there and I had the feeling that dad was nearby, though I don't think I could see him. Molly kissed me on the lips and the cheeks as I cried. We were sitting in the kitchen of the Queen Anne house, overlooking Fremont with a sunrise/sunset sky. I cried so hard in the dream that as I began to open my eyes and come to, I began really sobbing, the way I had been in the dream.
I kept thinking, "You can't love enough to keep someone from death." After a while of crying and returning back to consciousness, I heard a crow loud and clear, directly outside my west window. The call was odd. He was grackling with a couple of quick vocalizations. Then a couple of caws and he was gone. i couldn't help but feel like it had been a visitation of a spirit (Barcode? Molly? Grandparents?) via the crow.
Either way, I lay in bed crying for a while. The memory of her soft, fluffy, orange fur still lives in my fingertips. It snowed last night, here in the city. As the sun rises outside, everything is sparkling white.

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