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almost 13 years ago
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Covered in spiders, telling off smokers, issues...

The first thing I saw in my mind’s eye when I woke up was two chunks of dirt, one big one small, both in the shape of pots as though they were dry potting soil that someone had taken out of the pots in order to compare their size. Thats all I remembered at first.

Then I fought for it and my dreams started to come back to me. I almost let them go, but I kept writing and drew the memories out of my internal cinema and on to the page.

I dreamed that Geo and I are in our bedroom. I am laying down in bright light, naked. Geo is standing in darkness and shadows, wearing a corporate looking business suit. Saraswati is in the room too in normal light, and says she can see how this would be a comfortable situation for us. She is serious. Then she leaves and Geo and I go to sleep (dream within a dream).

In my dream, I dream that Geo and I are laying next to each other, and that Geo then wakes me up from my dream (dream within a dream within a dream). I am bummed that Geo has woken me up from my happy dream of us lying next to each other. I can’t go back to sleep in my dream, so I get up and go downstairs.

We are moving, and there are 3-4 teenage boys involved in this move, as well as 2-3 teenage girls. I am helping get things into the right place in the moving truck, and then helping unload the truck. The teenage boys are lounging about, lethargic in the house.

I walk in the house and Tom is there, sitting on a couch. He is talking to himself, telling a dramatic story with his eyes wide. He lights a cigarette and starts smoking it in the house.

All the windows are closed. I say “What are you doing! At least open the windows!” and walk up and open the windows all around him. Tom looks up briefly, continuing to just tell himself (and anyone who happens to be around) the story. Eyes wide, all stories.

I am nervous because I don’t want my clothes to smell like smoke. My dad lives in the house next door and I plan to visit him. I don’t want him to think I’ve been smoking, because I haven’t.

There are spiders everywhere in the house. There is energetic pressure for me to have a dramatic reaction to the spiders. Many are on me. I refuse to be drawn to emotion/story about it, and allow them to go off of me at their own pace. Some tiny ones are crawling around my eyes, ears, and mouth. I accidentally kill a couple of them by rubbing my eyes and such.

I walk outside and see several teenage girls in the driveway. Two of them are throwing a lit cigarette back and forth to each other, sharing it. I notice a couple of butts on the ground too. I quickly pick up the butts in my hand and go stand between them at just the right moment to catch the lit cigarette. I take a couple of drags and it tastes disgusting. I stamp it out.

I turn to them and say “What do you think you’re doing? You think this is cool? This is not cool. This is Gross.” I look to both of them with seriousness in my eyes. Their mother is standing next to them. She is a smoker, obese, and unhappy. She looks divided and dull. I tell both of them to read the signs.

geo
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dry dirt
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