I dreamt that the man I had a crush on for over a year, I went to visit him, he called me and invited me, I came. He lived in a community home, there was a party there, I hung out in the party for awhile, talked with friends, danced, had a good time, I texted him and saw/heard he was in bed and that he'd come out later, it took awhile, I danced and had fun, then I went to visit him in his new room, there were a few people from the party gathered around, I went in, there were 3-4 people on the bench laying on it and others gathered around it on one side, one of the people was laying on top of him and kissing him, he was the center of attention, it was a female, it was a rowdy passionate, hot, kind of kiss, I wished it were me, then he saw me, got up with the smile still on his face and hugged me a hello with a hug that wasn't warm (his hugs are not warm, are distanced and boney generally).
Then she bent over and grabbed his animalistically, he bent over and was giggling and grabbing her, they made animal noises and then they ran off giggleromping with everybody that was there somewhere, I was left behind, alone, wondering whether to stay and talk to him sooner than later, wait for them to come back. he had invited me afterall, or should I leave, I stood there perplexed, waiting for next move's sign. A lady was sitting on the bed he was in earlier said, "This is Merielle's bed, it has a red cloth flag on it, it means it's busy and taken. I'm not sure if you understand the signal." I said, "oh, I'm sorry," and I left the room, realizing that she had planned on being with him and she was.... Though, I had been invited, I was not, I was continuously puzzled, why does he invite me when there is another who grabs him?
Back at the party, I spoke to some friends who knew him and one of them said that he was very young and had a lot to learn, that he is not mature yet, comforting me for his actions that sabotaged any relation for us and hurt me, that kept on inviting me and finding something "better" before I get there.
Then later, I was somewhere, and I cracked out of an egg, then he cracked out of an egg, as a super hero. There were two more eggs with people in it that we were superheroes with in another place before we were in the egg shells, though they were not cracking yet. The man I love, my superhero, had used a sword to get out, he became conscious in the egg and cracked it with sword. I don't remember how I got out, I feel like I felt my way out, I was the first one out, feeling like spirt wafting in the periphery of consciousness.
So, we pack to go and get out, get away to the next adventure away from this one, before the others are out of their shell. He grabs my cello and carries it on the stair case, I said, "we can sell that" (we had sold a lot for the road and to live), he stopped and looked at me questioningly, I then said, "or I can play it," then he smiled and kept on going carrying it to be brought with us.
He and I are being close, then the other Superhero starts cracking shell.
He tells me to go put my things we got ready into the car, go drive away and meet him on the corner. Which corner I ask? He said. "I'll find you." I was still questioning, "the one at the end of the road." I could see which one, though, not exactly.
I throw a bunch of jackets and clothing and stuff we had in a pile into my old red toyota van I used to have. I look around for what else, not liking to be in a hurry, knowing I'll forget something, I see my iPad, I almost left without it. There are the others iPads, they will know we use them, and looked through them, I start putting them away, he says, "no, go!"
I hear them coming out of shell, I drive off and out the gate in a hurry, not looking back. My hair is pink.
Scene switches the other egg that cracked came out the girl who was acting like my friend, the one who told me his maturity level at the party, she watched my pink hair in the red van drive off through the fence cracks and said, "oh there she goes."
She texts me and tells me that his maturity level has increased, he is mature now. And that she sees the difference. She wanted to tell me this. It makes me happy.
At the end of the street at the corner, I wait, I see fuzzy cloudy dimensions shifting, I am afraid he can't see me, I can't be seen and he can't be seen, I think I see him waiting too, I push the fuzzy dimension cloud aside as much as possible, and I see that we are each in a cubby of a shelf sitting in it waiting, the cubby holes are next to each other on the bottom shelf, as if on different sides of corner, so not quite in same place, yet so close. I am then a person in a bookstore, looking at the cubbies and I see the places we each were are in the cubbies are then each a tarot deck of cards in their box, I pick them up, each one is only partly full, my deck has fewer cards then his. I pick a card out of each and look at the back side of the card.
His tarot deck back has a machine gun on it, it is about being direct and forceful with words and ideas, triggering things and scouring through them to glean the highest potential. It is black and white.
My tarot deck is light purple and grey, on the back there are the words echoes and hints toward the use of nervous system, it is about being tapped into body and shedding layers through connection with mind/body/spirit.
I pick a card each.
I start reading them, I awake.