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Dark Jungle Walk, Death Vigil, Challenging a Goddess

5/31/11
3 varied dreams intersecting...

I decide to take a walk through the jungle even though it's pretty dark.
It's not totally dark.
I am leading a few Asian people through the dark jungle. You really can't see shit. But each step I take in the dark reveals a tiny bit of light to see. It's more like a tree plantation at night after a clear cut. Very thick and dense plantings with funky energy. Trails narrower than shoulder width. I don't care I want to go. We trek down to the river. I am really pressing the matter as these people don't want to go and I know it's very very difficult and near impossible. At the river the moon is probably half full because there is a light coming off the water. I sense predatory animals. Alligators! I say "oh shit I forgot about them, come on". So we back track really quickly while the alligators start pursuing us. They disappear pretty quickly though. Through the dark trunks of trees become rafters, become 2x4's of an unfinished dwelling, an attic maybe.

An old lady is in bed there. She is telling me she needs things. She is sick or something. She feels like a squatter. (Blending waking life as I am nightshift caregiving a sick elderly lady who happens to be really needy sometimes) I don't stay here long.
The whole thing morphs to a challenge with this strange goddess in the sky. At first she is on the ground. Somewhat of a country scene. There are cow hides, drums, rattles, amulets, magical accoutrements. She is telling me she needs more magical items. I tell her she has more than enough. She gets mad at me. She rises into the sky. She is wearing long flowing blue silk fabric. She is timeless. She is wrathful but I am not intimidated by her. She rises high up. I am in a kitchen looking out the window at her superimposed on me standing on the ground outside beneath her in the air. She yells FIREEEEEEEE. I loudly say LOVEEEEEEEEEEEE. It's a standoff for sure. We disagree but I know I pissed her off and she wants to come after me somehow and when I least expect it. I hold my ground. I see her descend later and she has flowers all in her hair and a costume change. She looks more like a may queen. I say "WE love you DIANA" I see her meandering and putting around. She is picking up old real estate signs up off these lawns of this neighborhood. I think it's strange.

I am at some sort of yuppie new age temple. It feels like it's a space ship because it's very round and there is a great vortex of energy activating inside of it. People are holding a heavy ritual. They are reverent and ecstatic. I am actually in the background as I am with one other woman sitting at a little bar/ nook outside this building looking in through this glassless window. She is a misfit somehow . I am watching. Both of us become activated by allowing all of the energy to invade our bodies. It is a very powerful positive mystical new experience. I have never experienced this before. The floors are wooden. Lots of yoga and dance going on. I see myself transform into a Bali temple dancer. I am looking in a mirror in a room off the main round room. It is pretty dim in this studio room. The transformation is very subtle as I am seeing it with my third eye. I see my headress jewelry/crown and white magnetic light coming off of me. I immediately go into Butoh space and start dancing with this other lady. I begin to "dance" like a snake moving through air. My body parallel to the ground hovering over it and almost contact improving the walls and boundaries of the room. I was wondering when I would dancefly again. It happened ;) I stay in that space for a while enjoying and not touching the ground as i dance in the air. A blonde yuppie yogini comes in the room. She is a total snooty bitch and starts doing all these difficult poses. She asks me if I can do them. I look at her coldly and glide off the ground away from her. I did not like her arrogance. It somewhat took me out of this really open spirit place. I fly into this tiny room. Meanwhile outside the chanting, singing, dancing, sweating, and prayers are getting heavier and heavier. It is all for the man dying in this little room...

3 black men are in this tiny room. A man lays on his death bed. They are Ethiopian or Jamaican. One man notices me as I fly in. I am in spirit form. I am hovering over them not saying anything but I want them to know that I am good and I am here for them. I fly around the room a lot to get all of there attention. As I do I come down and hold the man that is dying from behind his head. His head is in my lap. I am holding his head. His energy is so vivid and real. I feel his sweat. I feel his skin and taste his smell. He's a good man. Gentle righteous soul. These are his brothers. I begin to get ego consciousness as Daesha and feel uncomfortable. I start thinking racially. That they are judging this white woman for coming in such a sacred time and trying to be a presence there. I ask them if they want me to leave. No one makes any response. They are watching me. I ask the man if he has fever. He laughs. I say "HIV? Cancer?" He doesn't respond but it was one of these. I am giving him all the light and love that I can. It is flowing from me but unfortunately I am going back and forth from spirit to ego consciousness. I want to physically blow energy through his crown but I am afraid they are judging me and not wanting me to do this so I just do it energetically. He takes it all in...All of a sudden his body disappears. He died. They are incredulous and can't figure out what happened. I say "wow this never happens, he was beyond ready to go." The dying man left something behind in the room. He messed some things up. He put some sort of sewing tools in my hair as 2 locks that became all tangled up with these tools. It was very odd. The room was like an old person's sewing/storage craft room. I showed them my hair. Then the younger brother starts freaking out and saying "oh my god I can't smell him, he's gone, his smell isn't here." As he was frantically sniffing the blankets of the bed the dying man lay. Then the body reappears ; the spirit sent it back for his brothers to hold, to lament, and grieve. Everything that the people were doing in the other room was for these men but they didn't know it. In fact they had paid or supported these men somehow to visit. There was an African band that was there adding to the energy that was affiliated with these brothers who were "backstage." OWL energy was there heavy as I saw flashes of these small little unusual owls in my minds eye...

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