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Falling Back

Early evening of November 30, 2014. Sunday.

Ever since I was young, I learned how certain recorded affirmations in a loop (and altered in particular ways, which must be done correctly but would take hundreds of pages to clarify) - and at a fairly low volume using headphones - placed me into altered states fairly quickly (sometimes within less than three minutes or so). This is more effective with at least two different "streams" in two different locations of the stereo field (although one stream can be centered or monophonic). I never needed anything else and in fact, had been able to duplicate any kind of perceptual state without any drug or commercial product (which seems moot as dreaming is already a totally natural function anyway, but which is greatly enhanced through education, sharpening the mind, and real-life experience).

Sometimes there are drawbacks, but fairly inconsequential. This one was the "falling back into myself" event. This was caused by the fact that the sequence was only 22 minutes long and stopped suddenly, causing me to shift consciousness too rapidly (I did not intend to fully shift into this other state but sometimes it cannot be helped as it is often automatic at one point even if I am otherwise fully awake up until then). I had fallen into a deep altered state while sitting up in a chair (head slightly tilted to the right) and this is the second time it had happened recently with the "falling" event. It was so vivid and intense, I was nauseous for several minutes (much like car sickness but a bit more powerful), but then in a more focused clarity at this later stage.

Entering this other "realm" or mental location, whatever it is, had always been (for over forty years) preceded by the exact same "imaginary" sound pulsing. This is always the sound of what seems like a small stone falling into a shallow amount of water, but with various frequencies over time, and in differently oriented areas of my perception, and similar audio effects, which are mostly fluid-like. (However, there are sometimes stages where it sounds similar to someone flicking the tab on an empty soda can.)

Falling sensations "from greater heights" (seemingly) during actual normal sleeping times has been very rare for me over the last twenty years or so (other than when I deliberately do certain flying maneuvers).

During the session as I was otherwise reading here and there and looking at a couple web sites, I started to realize I was shifting and thought it might be a good idea to lie down, as I do not really like sleeping or being in a trance in an upright position when I do not have head support. I started to become aware of vague sketchy patterns - somewhat comic-strip-like, but then seemed to be very aware of a girl (wearing blue jean shorts) walking over to me and placing glasses with lighter blue lenses on my face - not only did I see this, I also felt a change in my awareness once the glasses were over my eyes. After this, I am trying to focus. I am quite aware of the imaginary sound pulsing, which at times, seems to have audio "tendrils" emerging from the stone-into-water effect coming out into intricate higher frequencies in an almost ecstatic way, almost musical (bordering on the nuances of an intricate chime effect). Another typical sound in this state is a sound somewhat like the single shuffle of a bird's wing, which sometimes seems to cross over through either ear.

Eventually, after being who-knows-where for about twenty minutes, I find myself suddenly fully conscious "too quickly" and falling rapidly into myself (from a seemingly great distance) and am aware that all sound (both real and imaginary) has completely stopped. The nausea is a bit much but short-lasting and inconsequential.

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