almost 8 years ago
"Blip" and "reboot" and old memory surfaced

Early evening of February 6th, 2014. Thursday.

This particular dream came about from more time in one "pulsing" session than usual, yet with shorter phrasing. Normally, I do feel as if my body is light and "misty" and any prior pain or discomfort vanishes completely (and stays gone for some time). I did not include any imagery programming of any kind (or any intended type of memory of visual activation), just general powerful phrases that have worked throughout my lifetime (although I do try new variations quite often - in this case I also used "Infinite Mind" in the phrasing as well as the usual "maximum well-being"). I was at the computer with headphones projecting my audio tracks at a very low volume, yet after about two hours of not paying much attention (consciously) to the sounds, I heard a very clear and distinctive "blip" in my right ear of the kind I have heard all my life when slipping into certain states of consciousness (usually when near some level of approaching hypnagogia). This is always the exact same sound and awareness shift, almost like hearing a drop of rain splashing on the top of a thin metal lid of a small jar. The sound has never varied in any way in my lifetime even slightly, which makes me know it is some sort of physical function relating to changes in consciousness and hypnagogia. It does not seem to relate at all to sleep paralysis - which always has a quite different higher-pitched oscillation, which also has always been exactly the same throughout my life in that state.

I almost lost consciousness without wanting to (my fault for letting the phrasing continue so long without focusing on an intended meditation session but I do this knowing that I do not have to actively listen for it to "work") - and very suddenly - although I was not aware of any stable portal at the time regardless of the first "blip". Being at this level with this particular type of special affirmation sequencing puts me in an extremely deep state even when not even listening at all - from a perceived "misty" or cloud-like physical form (by which I can still function well enough) to rock-heavy sensations (not commercial products - I only ever use my own work and knowledge of such - most commercial "tools" are not only "incorrect" - sometimes seemingly on purpose, likely to continue to make money from gullible people - but counterproductive or even dangerous or foolish by what they imply). As it was, I became too sleepy and physically "stunned" (not tired - there is a clear difference) to continue any work at the time, so I turned off the audio and rested a bit in bed. After a time, I fell into a very odd "stop" state as if I briefly died and had to "reignite myself" but not with the usual rekindled force of will - I did yell in real life at the time. After this happened, I felt very young and energized to the point where a very vague physical discomfort I had was no longer there anywhere at all - which lasted about a full twenty-four hours (often, though, such sessions do not show results until twenty-four hours later - it depends on the phrasing and how gerunds are used, it seems). Again, the "body as mist" awareness. I am honestly not sure how "material-based" or substantial this is - I am not sure of the full physical repercussions; that is, if my DNA is somehow altered - as it does seem so - I did gain full use of my left hand as a child when all the "experts" said it would not be possible due to separated nerves and tendons and the screw-up the doctor did. I did make a bad toothache vanish in a short time years ago - by which a sound like a large rock or boulder "speaking" hit me (and it seemed slightly annoyed - or maybe I perceived it incorrectly as I did not grasp what it said - but it was layered and very "loud" and in an extremely low pitch and frequency) and the toothache vanished and never came back. Similar things have happened including with the back pain I had sometime back where I could barely move without a lot of pain - but now I seem physically normal again.

During this time, I dreamed vividly of the backyard in Cubitis. I recalled something I had almost forgotten over the years - which is quite clear and vivid as I "float" around the imagery. It was the concrete birdbath my father had made my mother in the center of the yard. It was fairly large with a square top and a little "island" in the center. He wrote (engraved by moving the wet concrete) the year (and some other details including, I believe, my mother's first name) on the top (I believe it was 1975). Also, I recall the tall round green bird-feeder we had (on a green pole). This is quite strange in how I had not held these two features in my mind for some time. I felt a sense of love and timelessness. The birdbath almost seemed like a "missing piece" of some kind and was also very clear in residual hypnopompic levels.

theta b3.0
random dream...
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